Instead, this is mashing together two of my favorite things: WoW and Lord of the Rings! My husband and I came up with it last night while he was washing dishes for Valentine's Day (it was AWESOME!).
The quest to destroy the Ring is a 10-Man Raid, and it's divided into three parts. A guild called Fellowship decides to do a run with 9 people (all Alliance, sorry Hordies!) and no healer.
Gandalf - Raid Leader/DPS - Human Mage
Aragorn - Main Tank - Human Paladin
Boromir - Off Tank - Human
Legolas - DPS - Night Elf Hunter
Gimli - DPS - Dwarf Warrior
Merry - DPS - Gnome Warrior? Rogue?
Pippin - DPS - Gnome Warrior? Rogue?
Sam - DPS - Gnome Chef
Frodo - DPS - Gnome Brat
The gnomes decide to walk to the raid entrance. On the way they meet some nasty elementals, do a lot of hiding, and spend most of their time eating and resting. Aragorn meets up with them in the middle, and Frodo gets a nasty de-buff cast on him. Boromir does the same thing, but he's moody and won't talk about what happened on his trip. Gandalf has some trouble with a Horde warlock and is eventually able to hop on his flying mount and fly to the entrance. Legolas comes for the grins and giggles. Gimli, who really likes to role play and should probably be in Clan Battlehammer, thinks it's what his character would do and goes along.
In The Halls of Khazad-dum, the first big part of the first part of the raid, a lot of stuff happens. Gimli got weepy when he saw a random tomb and declared that it was a relative. No one was paying attention to anyone's gear, so no one knew that Frodo had an epic in his chest slot that absorbed a lot of damage and saved the gnome's life. And then the unthinkable happened: The mage went OOM. He tried to be a hero and take on a boss on his own. Yeah, he downed it, but he died in the process. Aragorn was yelling "Blink! Gandalf, blink!" Didn't work. Gandalf disconnected, too, and didn't come back online after he died. The guys in the party decided to 8-man it since they didn't want to pull anyone else in, and kept going.
After a small vehicle quest with some lame arrow game on a river, the party decided to stop for a while. At this point, it's worth mentioning that there is a quest item, and only one person has it: Frodo. It allows him to go invisible, but over time it stacks a small de-buff on him whether he wears it or not. When they stopped at the side of the river, Aragorn pushed his new status as Raid Leader off on Frodo and told him to pick which way to go. Frodo walked off to think about it and look around, and Boromir followed him. Turns out, Boromir wanted the quest item and was getting angry that Frodo had it and wouldn't give it to him. "Dude, I need the xp! Do you know what I could get with that thing?!" He ended up hurting Frodo's feelings, so Frodo went invisible and ran away. He figured that everyone else wanted the item, too, and decided to finish the raid on his own, sneaking around all the mobs and bosses.
It's a good thing he was invisible and sneaking around, since a huge amount of patrolling trash mobs showed up. They Death Gripped Merry and Pippin and pulled them away from everyone else and killed Boromir. He logged off afterward 'cause he didn't want to play with Frodo any more, and left the guild the next time he logged on. Frodo swam across the river (and since you can't not swim in WoW [it should be known that Sam can't swim and doesn't trust water in LotR]) and Sam followed him. Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli decided to follow Merry and Pippin, since they wanted more boss battles and it was pretty obvious that Frodo was going to sneak around them.
Sam and Frodo picked up a mechagnome NPC named Gollum, who led them most of the way to where they were going. Blizzard made the NPC so that you had to be careful around him in case he decided to randomly slit your throat. Frodo, being lazy as usual, decided to keep him around and not kill him when his name went red so that he wouldn't have to find his own way to the end of the raid. Sam didn't like it and roughed up the NPC every chance he got. Because neither of them read up on the raid or the quest, they didn't know that Gollum would eventually betray you and lead you to a big SpiderBoss. Frodo got stunned, Sam killed the boss, and they were almost there!
The two gnomes eventually reached the point that triggered an epic cut-scene where Gollum takes the Ring (quest item) and dances around, and then falls off a ledge into some lava. The ring is destroyed and the quest complete. The cut scene keeps going, though, showing Sam and Frodo running out of the mountain as it explodes lots of lava. Some Gryphons come and pick them up and carry them to a city. The end!
I didn't cover the content for the other half of the Fellowship because I can't figure out how to fit that into a raid context. I also don't like Frodo very much at all, in case you can't tell.
I had my first night of work last night and it's worse than before. I'll be changing jobs as soon as I possibly can. In the meantime, though, my hours are crazy! I either work really early or really late. This means that I'll be trying out the scheduled post function.
Tomorrow will be a stir-fry recipe that Josh absolutely loves. Pork Chow Mein.